Prayers for Oklahoma

There’s really nothing I can say in regards to the tragedy in Oklahoma that hasn’t already been said.  The question of “why” is still in my head.  I am grateful that my adoption buddy, Amy M. is safe…she lives in Shawnee.  You have no idea how many times I refreshed my Facebook page to see if she’d posted an update on Sunday…and then again on Monday.  My friend Rachel’s in laws are safe…they live not far from the area which was hardest hit.  So very lucky…

My heart breaks for the parents who kissed their children goodbye as they left for school that morning never imagining in their wildest dreams it would be the last kiss.  The last hug.  The last “I love you”.

Let this serve as a reminder that none of us are promised tomorrow and to take extra time to express our feelings to the ones we love most. 

And in the meantime, pray hard for all those affected by this tragedy.

Passport To Purity

If you have a daughter who is about to be a tween or already a tween, I highly recommend this program for “the talk”.

It is meant to be done as a weekend trip with just you and your girl.  Jenna and I are embarking on this adventure in a few weeks.  We’ll be traveling to Chattanooga (and I get to see my dear friend Julie while there!) and spending a weekend together dealing with just the issues surrounding this area. 

My friend Rachel VG turned me on to this and I owe her BIG TIME.  I have spent several hours preparing ahead of time and I’m still not ready yet.  I’ll warn you…it takes some time to prepare, but not too much.  I just preferred to listen to the sessions (on CD) prior to hopping in the car and heading out.  And let me tell you…it covers EVERYTHING.  And it’s deep stuff.  And embarrassing stuff.  And intense stuff.

And NECESSARY stuff.

As Christian parents, we need to deal with all that goes along with “the talk” or someone else will do it for us. 

So, if you think about it…pray for us over the next few weeks as I prepare the sessions, prepare myself and pray that Jenna is prepared.  I hope this will open up the lines of communication now so she’s free to talk to me later when it REALLY matters.

Help Needed

"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." ~John 14:18

Today, my heart is very heavy with the passing of the Russian law essentially prohibiting Russian adoptions by Americans.

A sweet friend at church has a brother and sister in law who are mid-adoption right now for their sweet son, Josiah, who they met just a few weeks ago for the first time.  At this point, it is unclear how this law will affect them (or any of the other families that are in process), but we need to be on our knees for this law to be changed and changed quickly.

I received a forwarded email plea from this family today that I would like to share with you all...when you are finished reading, I ask that you take action.  Blog it, Facebook it, Tweet it...and then DO IT.  Make the call.  Send the email.  Above all, whisper a prayer.

These are CHILDREN.  And they have families who are here...in America.  Already loving them.  Already waiting for them.  Already preparing for them.

Help bring them home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Greetings family and friends!

First off, Courtney and I want to say thanks for your continued prayers and support throughout this journey. Your continued calls, e-mails, texts, Facebook and Twitter messages are a source of encouragement for us. We give thanks for each of you and praise God for allowing you to be a part of our lives and in turn this journey.

Second, many of you have asked how you can help. As you know, this morning (our time) President Putin signed into law the ban on US Adoptions. We talked with our Adoption Agency and they have suggested that we have our family and friends contact two different sets of people. The best thing we can do right now is lobby for an agreement that would allow families like ours, who have met their children and are waiting on a court date, the opportunity to finish out the process and bring their children home.

First, call on the White House directly. You can contact the comments line and talk to an operator at 202-456-1111. Please say something to this effect:

“Hello, my name is _____ and I live in _____. I am calling on behalf of my (friends or family members) Josh and Courtney Clarke who are in the process of adoption from Russia. They have already signed a letter of intent in Russia for a two year old little boy and are waiting for a court date. I ask that President Obama contact President Putin directly to talk about the ban on adoptions from the United States, but specifically to work out a deal that would allow families like Josh and Courtney, who have already met their child, to bring them home safely.”

They also asked us to contact our Representatives and Senators. You can find your elected officials on this websitehttp://www.house.gov/representatives/find/ and http://www.senate.gov/general/contact_information/senators_cfm.cfm . When you talk with someone in their office please say something to this effect:

“Hello, my name is _____ and I live in _____. I am calling on behalf of my (friends or family members) Josh and Courtney Clarke who are in the process of adoption from Russia. They have already signed a letter of intent in Russia for a two year old little boy and are waiting for a court date. I ask that Congressman or Senator ______ contact Secretary of State Clinton and other members of the State Department to talk to them about the ban on adoptions from the United States, but specifically to work out a deal that would allow families like Josh and Courtney, who have already met their child, to bring them home safely. We also urge you to ensure that the United States State Department is following through with every commitment made in the agreement signed in July to ensure that adoptions can continue for years to come.”

Please make sure you do not reference anything negative about Russia or President Putin.  

Our goal is to let them know that the number “46” that appears in the news isn’t an arbitrary number that has no impact in their districts, but that we are real families that are longing to have our children home.

If you do not feel comfortable calling, then please don’t. There is no pressure to do this. If you would like to e-mail any of these people, please use the scripts above for your e-mail. Our agency mentioned to us that phone calls are most effective because of the time sensitive nature of this law.

However, more important than the letters or the phone calls are your prayers. We covet them, not only for us, but for the other families that do not know the status of bringing their children home and the almost 800,000 children in Russia that do not have any parental rights attached to them.

As we move forward we truly echo the words of Daniel 3:17-18, “our God is able to deliver us… but even if He does not…” we will still worship Him alone. Our prayer is that God’s will be done. We know He has the power to bring Josiah home tomorrow, but we also know that may not be His will. No matter the outcome of the governments of this world, we know who still sits on His throne and will reign forever more. Our faith will not be shaken. He is still our God and we are still His people. We will forever worship Him.

Love you all.

Josh and Courtney
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Now, I ask you...can you imagine what this family...THESE families...are going through?  I'd venture a guess that you CAN'T imagine.  Because I know I can't.  I implore you again, please help bring these children home. 

If you are so inclined, you can leave a word of encouragement on the Clarkes blog.  You can find them here.  They need to feel our support. 

Until then, may God watch over these children and bless their families as the wait.

Day of Silence

Upcoming Blogger Day of Silence

I know many of you are as heartbroken over the recent events in CT.  I have talked with friends about what happened.  We've debated gun control, mental health assistance, media involvement and school safety.  But really, the reason for this evil is that we live in a fallen world.  Evil is ever present and that, my blog friends, is a fact.   And so, rather than write a post, tweet, or Facebook on any or all of the above things and how I feel about them, I think we should focus on the hurting families.  There is one ONE Hope for this world.

His name is Jesus. 

And if you haven't ever thought about it before, think about it now.  If you have questions about who Jesus is and who He is to me, please leave me a comment or email.

But to show support and love to those affected by the events in Newtown, CT, Tuesday, December 18, 2012 I'm participating in a blogger day of silence.  I encourage you, if you are a blogger, to use the button and observe too.

<img src="https://sites.google.com/site/megoblogdesign/files/sandyhooksupport.png" />

On Tuesday, December 18th, there will be a blogger day of silence. We will post the button and that's it. Please try to not post anything else that day if possible.

We are also raising money that will go to an organization in the memory of this tragedy. The organization is called The Newtown Family Youth and Family Services. Here is the official description of the support service we are donating to:

"Newtown Youth and Family Services, Inc. is a licensed, non-profit, mental health clinic and youth services bureau dedicated to helping children and families achieve their highest potential. NYFS provides programs, services, activities, counseling, support groups and education throughout the Greater Newtown area.

ANY DONATIONS MADE TO NEWTOWN YOUTH AND FAMILY SERVICES WILL BE DONATED DIRECTLY TO THOSE EFFECTED BY THE SANDY HOOK ELEMENTARY SCHOOL SHOOTING."

Please visit THIS PAGE to make your donation.

We can't imagine how they must be feeling, especially this close to the holidays. We would love for you to spread the word on your own blog, Facebook, Twitter, etc. Let's make a difference and use blogging in a positive way. Thank you in advance for participating.

Love,
The Blog World

p.s. If you would like to, copy-paste and repost any part of this, please do. Share on.

Copied from here.

Home Sweet Home

We.  Are.  Home.

The doctor came in before 8am this morning and confirmed we would be going home today.  Steve went ahead and came up to the hospital, but it was nearly 2 hours before all the paperwork was done. 

Kylie fussed all the way home and was very timid once inside the house.  I gave here about 15 minutes of sitting with me and then the cats came down and she started to get more animated.  By the time I had finished unpacking and getting some laundry going, she was running around like normal.  She is a little more cranky than usual but that is likely due to residual pain.  She is now on Tylenol OTC and we have Tylenol with codeine for bedtime.  Bedtime should be interesting.  She pretty much napped in our arms this whole week and at night, she slept with us on the bed.

She ate immediately when we got home.  She's on an all liquid diet from now until next Monday when we go back to the doctor.  So her choices are currently jello, yogurt, ice cream, milkshakes, pudding etc.  If you have any other ideas of stuff like that she can have, let me know.  She can't yet have soft foods like mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese.  Hopefully by next Monday we can graduate to soft foods though.

Last night was OK.  She went to bed about 8:30 and slept soundly until about 1am.  Then it took her some time to settle down into sleep again and at 2am they were in there for antibiotics, pain meds and vitals.  And she was off and on awake the rest of the morning.  I'm attempting to stay awake until bedtime.  We haven't figured out what we will do about that.  It's Steve's night "on" but since I have to go to work Tuesday, I might as well take tonight too so he'll be good and rested for Monday night.

Thanks for all the prayers.  They have certainly been felt and appreciated.  We continue to covet your prayers that this is 100% successful, that her pain remains easy to control and that her sleep patterns return to normal as soon as possible.

Post Op, Day 1

I would say this is going to be quick, but you all know me better than that.  A little fatigue never stopped me from being overly verbose in my blog posts.

First, let me share with you something I think is hilarious and that is Kylie right after she got her "happy juice" before she went back to surgery.  It seriously makes me laugh every time I watch it (although delirium will do that to ya).

So, we finally got to our room in the PICU last night.  Yes, our doctor is conservative and I think I mentioned that in an earlier post.  I don't know of any other doctor that puts their children in ICU after this type of surgery.  But since there was such major surgery so near to the back of her throat, he wanted to monitor her breathing.

In the waiting room Monday.

Anyway, we moved from morphine to Tylenol with codeine for pain before leaving the recovery room last night.  It was 9pm or after by the time our room was ready in the PICU and Kylie was DONE with the day. She didn't want to drink anything at all and it was a challenge to get her meds down her.  I would say she slept about 3 out of every 4 hours.  The first hour or hour and 1/2 she would sleep in her bed.  Then I had to hold her.  So while she slept as well as could be expected in the ICU, I didn't sleep but maybe 3 total hours and that is piecing them all together!

Steve showed up about 8 after dropping Jenna at school and I managed to squeeze maybe 2 broken up hours of sleep.  Then I got my second wind, got dressed and felt better.  The plastic surgeon came by and looked at her mouth (which yes, we traumatizing to her) and said it looked GREAT!  She remained on a clear liquid diet today since she hadn't really drank anything at all.  He did say her vitals were fine and no problems with her breathing, so we were released to go to a regular floor.

Her cute hospital PJs.  The white pants make her look like the karate kid!

Steve and I took turns holding Kylie and that gave him time to grab us some lunch and switch off eating.  Kylie tends to get irritable after being in the room for any length of time, so I had the bright idea of getting the iPad and turning on her favorite movie.  She had just had her dose of pain medicine so I figured after 15-20 minutes she'd be out.

NOT. SO. MUCH.  That gal loves Annie.  She sat like this (or a variety of other ways) and watched the entire movie.  As soon as it was over, they came to move us.  She enjoyed being out of the room because we really couldn't go anywhere in the PICU.  We got on our new floor and of course, all the new nurses taking vitals and looking at her upset her.  She cried and cried and then all of a sudden fell over snoring.  Guess that medicine finally got to her! She slept right up until the next dose almost. 

You can't tell it here, but she's happy to have her jie jie here and Jenna was CRAZY to be able to hold her (as you can tell by the smile on her face).

Kylie has had what I'd consider to be a pretty good day all things considered.  She did drink about a cup of apple juice today and that is wonderful and all the nurses were thrilled.  She still has IV fluids going until they are confident she can stay hydrated on her own, but that means we are changing wet diapers every hour.  So her kidneys are working just fine!

Kylie did love on her bear (thanks Mr. Will!) a lot and made some signs as well as did Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. She has made her squint eyes face for a select few.  So we are seeing glimpses of our girl.  I hope tonight is a good night for both her and Steve.  I'm going to bed now...yes, at 8:30.  And I'm not feeling guilty about that AT ALL.

Thanks for your well wishes and prayers.  They are being heard and answered.  While you are at it, pray for the other children at Vandy Children's.  So many of them are there for way worse issues than cleft palate repair.  My heart breaks to think of them.  So while you pray for Kylie, pray for those children and their families as well. We are fortunate.

More tomorrow...

It's coming...

The day we have been expecting since we first saw Kylie's face is almost upon us.

This Monday, Kylie will go to the hospital to have her palate repaired.  We are going to be in one of the best children's hospitals in the country.  The plastic surgeon is one of the best in the country, known by all his medical colleagues as a "perfectionist".

But none of this puts my mind at ease.  This Mama's heart is dreading Monday and they days to follow.  Don't get me wrong, we'll all be glad to have it over with, but I just can barely stand to think of this sweet face not understanding the pain she is in.

The surgery isn't supposed to take place until 1pm, so that means no solid food from 3am on.  She can have milk up until 5am and then only clear liquids until 9.  Since she wakes up between 7:30-8:30 in the morning, she will likely have only an hour of drinking clear liquid before she can't have anything.  That's going to be a long time for someone who can't understand.

And we all know that surgery won't actually start at 1pm.  Kylie will stay in the PICU Monday night and then be moved to a private room hopefully on Tuesday. She will stay in the hospital until the doctor is convinced she is eating/drinking adequately and her pain is under control.

So, keep us all in your thoughts and prayers next week.  Visit the blog often...I'll update when I can.

Do I?

It's been a rough week here at the Taylor household.  At the risk of sounding like I'm complaining about my little problems when there are those out there struggling with way worse things, I'll make it quick (or not).

Before that, let me give you a little background...when we brought Kylie home, the only place she would sleep was ON us.  Those were some dark days trying to figure out what would work.  You'd think sleeping on the couch or in a recliner with her would have come to our minds pretty quickly, but no, not so much.  Finally after what seemed like an eternity, we started taking turns sleeping downstairs with her on us while the other slept peacefully and quietly in the upstairs bedroom.

After a while of that, we moved her to the pack n play in the living room while we alternated sleeping on the couch.  As she acclimated to that, we moved the pack n play to our bedroom.  That was fine, but boy it was hard to get up in the morning and tiptoe around.  I use the bathroom during the night pretty frequently and I was always afraid of waking her up.

It wasn't too long before we moved her to her crib in her room and took turns sleeping on the portable mattress on the floor in her room.  Finally, after seriously what seemed like forever, we were back in the bed together and Kylie sleeping in the crib in her room.  She would still awaken multiple times a night, crying out.  We took turns going to her bedroom, patting her for maybe 30 seconds to a minute and she'd ease off back to sleep.  These times because less and less until we were getting up maybe once or twice a night and for about 30 seconds and that was it.  By this time, I was back to work, so Steve would take the weekday night shift and I'd take the weekend night shift.

Then she started sleeping through the night and might cry out briefly once or twice, but we wouldn't have to get up and go to her anymore.  That progressed into sleeping without making a noise.  Then, miracle of all miracles, she started sleeping until like 9 or 10am and taking 2-3 hour naps.  GLORY!  And yes, I thought something was wrong.  :)  That slowly wore off (growth spurt over) and she began waking earlier and earlier in the morning.  The last 3 days she has been up multiple times a night, not just crying out, but crying, standing in her crib and having to be removed, held and rocked for 20-30 minutes before going back to sleep. 

We've tried everything we know to do to get her back to sleeping decently again and nothing has worked.  And quite frankly, even though we have come miles from those first days and weeks home, we are OVER IT.  We are exhausted.  Steve mainly because he's the one taking the brunt of it.  But of course, I lay awake while he's with her, trying desperately to put her back to bed without her screaming, and feel guilty that I have to get up and work the next day.  We've really been struggling this week.

Today, on my way to work, I was thinking about why this is happening.  I do feel like my church, collectively and individually, has been under spiritual attack.  So many young, hurting families.  Senseless things they are having to face and go through.  And while I'm thankful and blessed both my girls and husband are not in the hospital fighting for their very lives, this is OUR battle and it's hard.

And we have prayed harder than ever before.  Not just about the sleeping/exhaustion issues, but about other hard things we are currently facing.  And this is the realization I came to.  The more I pray, the more God is going to draw me closer to Him.  And the closer to Him I get, the harder Satan is going to fight to pull me away.  Therefore, the more I pray, the harder things are going to get.

So, here is where the rubber meets the road.

I either keep praying, knowing Satan isn't going to give up easily and it's possible things are going to get worse, maybe WAY worse, before they get better.  Or I stop praying, give up on the whole God thing and live a different life.

And it all comes down to whether I trust God. 

Trust Him wholeheartedly.  Trust him with the sleepless nights.  With 3 years of unemployment.  With feeling like we are lost.  With having to tell my daughter we have no money to go school shopping.  With wondering why I have to do more with less.

And so it is.  The decision is mine to make.  Strap in and hold on?  Or turn my back and walk away?

Do I trust Him?

I DO.

Buckle up.

How are we doing? Part II

We are now nearly 2 weeks home...so the question we get all the time is how are we doing.

At the risk of jinxing things, we seemed to have turned a corner.  Kylie LOVES the bath.  Let me give you a small taste of just HOW much she loves it...

We weren't really sure what to expect because we only gave her a few baths in the sink in China.  And they were super fast out of necessity.

Kylie has gone from not sleeping at all anywhere to sleeping on the couch in the living room downstairs.  Steve and I spent probably 1/2 a week swapping up who would sleep on the recliner.  The other would take the bed.  We'd shut the bedroom door so we couldn't hear if she was crying downstairs.  This finally gave us the much needed rest we needed.  Then, he moved her to the pack n play downstairs and we took turns sleeping on the couch.  The couch was not my friend.  My night was Saturday before Easter and it was pretty miserable.  But I determined not to let Satan ruin that wonderful day and God blessed me with an extra measure of restfulness.

Kylie is now sleeping in her pack n play upstairs in our bedroom.  Last night was my "on" night and I didn't have to get up with her until about 1:45am.  I was able to pat her back to sleep.  She woke up again at 5:30am soaked through her diaper.  I changed her and held her in bed with me.  She fell back asleep and Steve got up to take Jenna to school (whoever is "on" during the night, the other does morning drop off) and I laid her on the bed next to me where we slept until 8am!  Praise!

So, we are doing better.  However, we are spending LOTS of time together at home so we feel like we are constantly entertaining her so we can bond.  And we are.  Pretty much one of us is holding, talking to, feeding, changing or playing with her.  So it is wearing on us.  We have been blessed by many, MANY meals from friends at church and that has been a LIFESAVER.  Each meal is delicious and delivered with much love for our sweet girl.  I will never be able to thank all the families that have assisted us in this way.  I plan to pay it forward as I can.

I got an email yesterday from a friend asking what we need and how we ended up on our fundraising.  I thought if she had those questions, my readers might too, so I'll answer them here.

We continue to need lots of prayers because this is hard.  In terms of physical needs, if you know of someone looking to get rid of 12 month girl clothes that are summer season, let me know.  Not knowing what size she was, we bought limited clothes.  She can wear 9 month, but will soon outgrow those.  I might take a trip to the local consignment store soon.  We have borrowed so much stuff from friends...we have been blessed.

As for our fundraising, after travel, we have about $9000 in travel expenses on our credit card.  I anticipate an adoption reimbursement from work in the amount of $4500, so that will cover about 1/2, after taxes.  We have two grants that we have not heard from and who will grant to families that have already traveled.  We should hear from them soon and we are praying hard that we are granted something from them.  If not, we will complete this adoption with about $4500 debt, which is pretty darn good.  Continue to pray for God's provision in this.

So that's the update from the Taylor household...now we are off to enjoy some dinner, ala KFC courtesy of our friends, the Millsaps.

Oh and if you have a chance, say a prayer for Steve's dad.  He is in congestive heart failure and the next 24/48 hours are critical.

Now that we are home...

Now that we are home, I thought I'd say a few words about where we are, where Kylie is and where you all fit in the picture.

If you missed this post, be sure and read it first.  Having that groundwork will help you understand what we are going through and what we are trying to do.

Kylie is a very happy child.  But being so happy means everyone is her friend.  Especially if you are standing and we are not.  :)  She wants to be moving ALL.  THE.  TIME.  So if we are sitting down with her or if she is sitting anywhere and you are standing, she's going to want to come to you because you are more fun if you are up moving around.

This worked in our favor so far because it allowed me to accept help from Deanne and Jenna while in China so I didn't have to do it all.  But now that we are home, Steve and I need to work hard on bonding with her.  She needs to know everyone loves her, but she needs to know that Steve and I are more than just "nannies".  We have to establish ourselves as her Mommy and Daddy. 

Last night, Kylie didn't sleep well at all.  I'm sure that is partially due to the fact that her days and nights are mixed up.  She could still be on China time and we are all trying to get back on the right schedule, especially Jenna because she has to go to school on Monday.

So what does this mean for you?  Are we accepting visitors?  YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT!  I have spent 2 weeks away from the best friends and family a girl could ask for and I'm thrilled if you want to come spend time with us.  We do ask that you call, text or email and ask if it's OK to come.  Please don't just drop in.  This is for a couple of reasons...we are also trying to get back on a sleep schedule which could mean a nap or two is in order.  Also, if you drop in just to see Kylie and she is asleep, then you wouldn't get to see her in action.  So just let us know if you want to drop by.  We'll tell you if it's OK.  And most times it will be.

When you are here, do not ask to hold Kylie.  We are trying to limit holding to just Steve, Jenna and I to facilitate bonding.  You can absolutely talk to her, call her name, take pictures, rub her back, head or hand and even pinch her cheeks (they are irresistible).  Try not to say "boo!" to her.  I know that sounds silly but you don't realize how much you say that to a baby until you are trying not to.  "Bu" in Mandarin means "no", so when you say "Boo!" to her, she thinks you are telling her "no".  As she learns English, that will resolve itself.  Also, try not to clap your hands to her.  This is what her nannies in the orphanage did when they wanted her to come to them.  So when you clap your hands, she thinks you are asking to pick her up.

And please don't take it personally if I don't answer the phone, immediately return an email or text or say it's not a good time for a visit!  It's NOT personal!  Oh, and if you haven't gotten a thank you note from me, I'd appreciate some grace.  I'm getting around to it!

So, enough of the don'ts, let's talk about the do's!

DO feel free to talk to Kylie and try to make her smile.  She's a happy baby and loves to smile.  She needs to know you are a friendly face.

DO text, email, call, comment on the blog or visit.  I have spent two weeks away from those I love most.  I welcome seeing you all.

DO remember that Jenna is also our child.  She also experienced two weeks without everything familiar, saw scary things in China, missed her friends, ate few familiar foods and missed home like crazy.  So many of you have gone the extra mile to make her feel special and I can't thank you enough!  Keep that up!

DO keep praying for us.  Your prayers literally carried us through this trip.  I can hardly believe we are on this side.  But we still need your prayers desperately.  So, please keep praying.  We are trying to adjust in a variety of ways. 

DO keep checking the blog!  I am going to catch up on my China posts.  I hope to put some video on here too. 

I can't tell you enough how much I appreciated the comments, emails, scriptures etc. that you sent while I was in China.  There is no way we could have made it those two weeks without your prayers and encouragement.  It was probably the hardest thing I'd ever done.  And we are still a work in progress.

I'm off to feed Kylie some dinner!  Wish us a more restful night tonight!

As You Are Reading This...

As you are reading this, I am likely flying over the ocean (or North Pole) on my way to get Kylie!  If you have just 30 seconds, please pray for our safe travels.  Pray that Jenna, Deanna and I can get some rest on the plane.  Pray for our health when we touch down in Beijing and for the weeks ahead of us.

Pray also for Steve...for those of you who have ever had a spouse travel internationally without you, it's unnerving to not be able to contact them while they are in transit.  Pray for his peace and for him to be able to rest.

The next time you hear from me, we'll be in a hotel room in Beijing!

Down to Hours...

We are literally down to hours before we are on our way to China.

Holy cow.  Did I just write, "on our way to China"???!!

We received another $100 today.

The suitcases are in the car and the carry ons are pretty much packed.  I had a backpack which weighed about 3857263 pounds with my oversized laptop.  As an aside, when I got this laptop, it was as a replacement (free) for the one that had crashed.  This was the same model just a little upgraded and had a huge screen.  It's super nice at home, but boy what a pain to travel with.  I was not looking forward to toting that thing around everywhere on my back, but that's all I had.

Until my sweet neighbor, an adoptive mommy with two sons from China (the youngest arriving just 3 weeks ago), came to bring a dinner dish back to us and noticed my huge backpack.  She offered to let me use her ROLLING bag for my laptop.  Unfortunately, the oversized laptop didn't fit in the laptop compartment, but it did fit in the actual case.  So now, my back is happy because I don't have to carry the backpack!  It's the little things...

So, anyway, I'm about to head to bed since my night will be shorter than usual.  My next post might be from Beijing!  Or it might be from Chicago.  Or maybe from here.  Who knows...

In the meantime, keep those prayers coming.  We are overwhelmed at the sheer number of those of you who have offered your prayers.  I literally stand amazed...and humbled.

Thank you friends.

Prayer Requests

Wednesday night my Bible study girls prayed over me as I embark upon this big part of our journey to Kylie.  As they prayed over me, they touched on so many things that need to be prayed over.  So as my friend Stacey recently said, if you are the praying type, here's how you can be praying for us specifically:

Kylie
*Health-pray that she is healthy and remains that way throughout the duration of our trip.  I have meds for a variety of illnesses that might occur, but it would really be un-fun to have sick baby on top of everything else.
*Her heart-Kylie is leaving EVERYTHING she has ever known to go with people who don't sound like her, don't look like her and don't act like her.  She is going from the only place she's known for a lengthy van ride to us, then to a hotel, then out and about etc.  For a child who has never seen anything but the inside of a hospital and orphanage, that is terrifying.  Please pray that God continues to prepare her heart to know us even though she's never met us.
*Bonding-Pray that this happens as easily as can be expected.

Jenna
*Health-I really worry about Jenna getting sick.  She's never been on this long of a flight before and I am praying her immune system is rock solid.
*Pray for her safety-China is a VERY. BIG. PLACE.  There are lots of people in China.  We've had discussions about always holding on to me, Aunt DeeDee or the guide no matter what.
*Pray for her heart-remember, for 10 years, Jenna has known life as pretty much an only child in the good ole USA.  She has known the love of a mother, father, sister, brother, family, friends, church and God.  It's quite the bubble she's lived in (we all have).  She is going to see things that she never knew existed.  She will see an orphanage full of children who have no mother or father.  I want this to impact her, but it will be hard for her sweet hard to digest.  Also, pray for her as she tries to bond with Kylie.  She is having a hard time understanding how Kylie wouldn't just love her right away like our friends Wylie, Nonie and Mary Brooks do.  Also, she has been our only child for 10 years.  Pray she feels our love as never ending no matter what.  It breaks my heart to think she might think we love her less, or not at all, now that Kylie is here.
*Pray against fear-Jenna's pretty fearless.   I want to keep it that way.  Pray that Satan doesn't get a foothold in this area.

Sandra
*My bonding with Kylie-I have read a lot lately about mom spending so much of their time making sure their new child bonds with them.  But this is NOT a one-way street.  I need to learn to bond with this child I've never met.  It's not like I carried her in my womb for 9 months...even though I have longed for her and prayed for her that long.  Post-adoption depression is real.  Pray against that with me.
*Patience-Oh my, yes I know what happens when people pray for patience.  One of my biggest fears (because I know myself too well) is that I will take my frustration, fatigue, fear out on Jenna.  I already know that at home Steve and Jenna get the brunt of my bad moods.  I will be jet lagged, irritated and scared out of my mind.  Please, PLEASE pray that I will remember to take my sweet girl's heart into consideration before snapping at her.  I can't bear the thought of her thinking that it's all Kylie's fault that I'm being hateful to her.  This is probably my biggest failure as a mom even now.
*My health-Again, I have tons of meds for what might ail me, but I need my strength.  I can get sick all I want when I'm home with Steve, but I really, really need to stay well (and rested...HA!) while in China and on the way back.

Steve
*Health-Those of you who know us, know this goes without saying.  I have a tremendous peace about this with Katie here, but he is still prone to kidney stones and crazy things.  I need to be with him if something happens (trust me when I say HE does not need ME as much as I need him!).  I just want to know he's well.
*His mind-I can't imagine how it must feel to send your wife and daughter (and sister) literally 1/2 way across the world to pick up your daughter and not be going.  Satan could certainly have a field day with this.  Pray that Steve has peace about the way we have arranged this.  And pray that his heart will be protected as Kylie comes home and tries to bond with him.  And pray that he does not worry.  I'm the worrier in the family, but when you are here by yourself, it's easy to think of things to worry about.
*His loneliness-Remember Steve doesn't work outside the home.  So not only will nights be lonely, but so will the days.  Our church family has already made plans to surround him during the time I'm gone, so he might not have a problem with this as much as I think he will, but let's pray for it anyway.  And thanks in advance to those who are going to be loving on him while I'm gone. 

Deanne and family
*All of the above-Not to short change Deanne, because I'm sure she has prayer requests of her own.  However, everything in the above applies to her.  She is going to be leaving a husband at home, alone and 2 grown daughters and 3 grandkids.  Those who love her most are not used to her being away from them for this long.  It is so much easier to be away from your family if you know they are healthy and safe.  Also, Deanne is going to be my surrogate husband while in China and wow...that's a tall order.  I'm going to be leaning on her to help me with Jenna, but she'll also have to balance that with how much (or how little) she can do with Kylie.  Imagine walking this journey with someone only to be limited in what you can do with the new child.  It won't be easy.   For anyone.

So, that's a lot, but there are so many things to pray for.  I'd also add that the long 13 hour flights to go quickly and on time etc. 

We can't say it enough...we covet your prayers....

Making Progress...

Today I did a little bit of shopping for the trip to China.  I got the men's gifts that I have to take bought.  I have gotten just about all the women's stuff done....just need a few more bags and some tissue paper and that should take care of the gifts.

Kylie's bag is almost packed completely.  I have a few things left to pack in her suitcase and then we are done until it's time to pack our clothes.

I get the question all the time if I am excited.  And of course I am.  But not as excited as most people would be at this point.  I think I have been burned so many times thinking things were moving along just to find out they weren't, that I'm fearful of getting my hopes up.  Tuesday our Article 5 should be picked up and then we'll be waiting on our Travel Approval. 

If you want something to pray about, pray that TA comes in 2-3 weeks.  We REALLY need it to come then if we plan to leave and be gone over spring break.

More to come....

My friend Darlene

Several months ago, I introduced you to my friend Darlene.  This summer, at the young age of 40, she was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer.  Since this, she has fought valiantly against this awful disease.  Late this fall, I was honored to do the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure and participate on Team Darlene.

I have had several of you ask me how Darlene is doing.  So I wanted to give you an update.  Several weeks ago, she rang the bell signaling her last chemo treatment!  This past week, she had the surgery that generally follows breast cancer.  She is now at home recovering.

I am pleased to report the tumor and surrounding infected tissue was completely removed!  Praise God!  And Darlene is doing very well in her recovery at this stage in the game.  However, they did find one tiny spot of cancer in the first lymph node they removed.  This news was pretty difficult to swallow because we know this means there is the potential for more chemo treatments ahead.

However, we are thrilled that the cancer is now no longer in her body.  And her friends are ready to walk with her for the remainder of this journey no matter how long that is.  So, please continue your prayers for my sweet Darlene.  She has remained so joyful during this awful journey.  Pray for her family as they help her recover.

If you are interested, you can go to her Caringbridge site here to read more.

IT'S HERE!!!!

LOA ARRIVED TODAY!!!  Praise the Lord!  Let me tell you just how awesome this news is...even moreso today...

Last fall, right before I was ready to leave on the mission journey to South Africa, I experienced an attack from Satan.  Those of you who have traveled on mission journeys before have most likely experienced this.  It was hard and I did NOT want to go on the trip.  I didn't want to go and leave my family.  I didn't know hardly anyone else going and two weeks was a long time.  Then a week before we departed, my brother passed away unexpectedly.  I was devastated and then not only did I not want to go, but neither did my family want me to go.  It was a hard ugly time.

When I got back to work after my bereavement leave, the sweet cleaning lady, Brenda, who cleans our building during the day passed by.  We often speak and she knew I was going on a mission journey soon, but obviously knew nothing of my internal struggle.  That particular day, she stopped her cart outside my office door and said, "The Lord spoke to me and I have a Word from Him for you."  Internally I was rolling my eyes because how hokey does that sound right??!  But then, she said to me, "He wanted me to encourage you as you go on this trip.  HE is sending you and HE has gone before you and everything is gonna be OK".  HOLY. COW.

Needless to say, it was all I could do to keep it together.  God may not speak audibly but I heard Him loud and clear through Brenda that day.  It was a little freakish.  But, while I still didn't look forward to leaving my family, the fear was gone.  It was an amazing time.

As I had my emotional breakdown earlier this week while waiting on my LOA, I jokingly said to my work BFF, Katelyn, "Maybe I need to have Brenda pray for my LOA!"  Katelyn, more seriously said she thought I should.  I saw Brenda a few times throughout the week, but it was never a convenient time to tell her the story and ask her to pray.

Until this morning.  Normally, another co-worker and I go down to get water or breakfast.  She is off today, so I went down alone...an unusual occurrance in and of itself.  When I walked into the cafeteria, who did I see, sitting there alone, eating breakfast?  Brenda.  And I knew, it was now or never.  To say I felt a little silly is an understatement, but I just plunged ahead telling her about the paper I needed from China and how long we had waited.  She knew I was adopting, but I showed her new pictures of Kylie etc.  She grabbed my hands and right there in the cafeteria prayed for my LOA to come.  And then she said, "It's on its way.  Mark my words.  That paper is coming."  The end.  Brenda had spoken.

2 1/2 hours later, I recevied the news that the LOA, indeed, had shown up at my agency.  If that isn't another direct word from God, I don't know what is.  And if you don't believe there is a God in heaven who hears us when we pray, you should think again.

Next up, Brenda is praying for Steve a job!!! :) :) :)

More to come...

The Day After...

The Taylor Family Blog is taking off a day today.  Not really since there is a blog here, but relatively speaking, this blog is going to be about nothing.

I'm sitting here, the only one up in my family, at 9:30am, looking at the aftermath of Christmas.  The kitchen table is full of the stuff that just gets dropped there when we come in the door.  The sink is full of dirty dishes because the dishwasher is full of clean dishes.  They are both full because of the cooking/baking frenzy that has been me the past three days.

The living room is a virtual minefield of toys, clothes, boxes, stocking stuffers and the like.  I managed to get up most of the wrapping paper and empty boxes, but the gifts are all down here and Jenna's are strewn from here to yon.

When I put Jenna to bed last night, I had to dance around to avoid the random items in her floor.  More on this later, but Chase got her an entire art studio for Christmas.  Like, acrylic paints, glow in the dark paint, brushes in every size and shape and even a professional looking easel.  All very nice and Jenna loves them, but she has nothing but paper to paint on.  She also has $50 in cash she racked up this Christmas among a large variety of gift cards.  So she is really wanting to go out to buy some canvases and paper to paint on.  I think I'm going to have to bribe her into cleaning her room if she wants to go out.  I have to work the rest of this week, so if the house is going to get clean, it needs to be done today.

I love Christmas.  Some years it takes me forever to get into the Christmas mood, but this year I was ready and I attribute it to doing most of my Christmas shopping the weekend before Thanksgiving. We (OK, Steve) even got Christmas lights up outside this year.  That hasn't happened in years.  But every Christmas, no matter my level of Christmas spirit, by the day after Christmas, I'm ready for it all to be gone.  I am a creature of order (though many times I am far from orderly) and schedule.  So by the time it's all over, I'm ready for my house to be back to normal.  Somehow, the dark Christmas tree with no gifts underneath is depressing so I'd rather it be gone all together.  I am sad to see Christmas go this year...seems like there wasn't much time to enjoy it before it was here.  But gone it is and now we look forward to 2012!  YIKES!

So, for a post about nothing, that was quite a long one.  Thanks for lasting this long.  I promise, there will be posts to follow with picture of our various Christmas celebrations.  But for now, this is what you get.

Also, if you think about it, pray for my friend Jennifer.  She and her husband just traveled to China in October to bring home her daughter home.  Last night she had to take her husband to the ER where they found him to be in congestive heart failure due to a serious problem with his kidneys.  They were doing a biopsy on his kidneys this morning to see what the problem is.  Hopefully, they can figure out what the problem with his kidneys are, fix that and reverse the congestive heart failure.  However, he is in very serious shape.  Jennifer and Jeff have 3 boys in addition to their new daughter from China.  Please pray for the doctors to have wisdom in fixing what is wrong.  I'll keep you posted as I know more.

Girls Who Nurture

At my church, there is a women's group called the Nurture Team.  These women truly are the hands and feet of the church.  They make baskets for new moms as well as those who have lost a loved one.  They also make meals for those in need.  They write cards and notes like CAH-RAZY.  Seriously.  I have been the recipient of many-a-basket a couple years ago when we experienced so many deaths in our family.  They are what I aspire to be one day when I grow up.

Well, a few months ago, they, at the suggestion of a young lady in the church, decided to start a Girl's Nurture Team.  The idea is they will mentor the younger girls in learning how to serve others.  If learned at a young age, our girls will then grow up with the natural inclination to serve others.  They meet once a month and they have done all manner of things such as making cards, baskets etc.

This past Saturday, the girls met up at the church and decorated cookies...

After decoration, the girls put several of their creations into little goodie bags.

And once everything was put together, we all rode down the street to the local assisted living facility.  Some of the girls (including Jenna) had been there before to dance ballet.  They practiced the song Children of God and then lined up for all the residents and sang. 



Then then handed out their cookies (they even had diabetic cookies for those that needed them).  Some of the residents immediately gobbled them up.  It was so touching to hear these girls singing and the residents just loved them.

It was a good experience for Jenna, but especially for me.  The next night, our Lifegroup went there to sing the old hymns and Christmas carols and just spend time with the residents.    I'll be honest and say I didn't want to go.  Hanging out with the elderly just isn't my thing.  I've never felt comfortable doing it although I'm not sure why.

But I saw my Daddy in many of those faces.  And though there weren't many residents out there when we began, once we started singing the old hymns, they started emerging from their rooms.  One gentleman rolled up in his wheelchair beside us.  After we finished singing, he thanked me for coming and we struck up a conversation.  He and his wife both live at the center.  They moved here from Florida and this was just a temporary stop until they were able to find a permanent home.  We talked for a while and he told me how they'd lived in a house in Florida and then came here and how he loved the staff because they were so nice.  It was a great chat and I told him we'd be back next month with the girls to do their ballet.  When we left, a friend of mine whose dad also resides there shared with me that he has Alzheimers.  His wife has Parkinsons.  And this is NOT just a temporary stop, but his permanent home. 

Another gentleman who was very friendly and outspoken walks with a walker and has a disease which renders him almost unable to walk some days.  He is only 67.  Many of these residents have family.  Many of them do not.  And my heart breaks for them.  I've thought of them all, often, since we went on Saturday.

If you have a minute, whisper a prayer from these wonderful men and women. 

The Coolest T-shirt Ever!

5 reasons you need one of our adoption t-shirts:

5.  Because let's be honest, you can NEVER have enough t-shirts.
4.  It's a great conversations starter when someone asks you about it.
3.  They are going to make GREAT Christmas gifts for teachers, family and friends.
2.  They are a great color which goes with anything and both guys and girls look good in them.

And the top reason you should buy one of our adoption t-shirts?

1. Because you can say you had a part in bringing a beautiful baby girl home to her family.  You can be part of OUR blessing.

Back of shirt

I've disabled my Paypal as a way of paying because by the time Paypal takes their portion and I pay to ship shirts out, I've lost nearly all of my profit.  If you are local, shirts are $20 and you can pay me by cash or check.  I'll of course deliver your shirt to you.  If you are not local, shirts are still $20, but please include $2.50 for shipping.  I can expedite ship your shirt to you for $5, so $2.50 will offset part of the shipping.  And you too can pay in cash or check.  (If you've recently purchased a shirt online and have not yet received it, you will NOT owe shipping!)  Shirts are available in S, M, L,XL and a few 2XL and 3XL. 

If you are interested in a t-shirt, email me at sandysignr(AT)charter(DOT)net (removing the words and inserting the proper punctuation) or you can leave a comment below.

For those of you who already have plenty of t-shirts and have no desire to have more, or for those that have already bought (THANKS!), you can still help.  Consider this your warning...I'm going to be contacting you soon.  I want you to simply sell 5 shirts to your friends or family.  I have 116 shirts left.  If 23 of you sold 5 shirts for me, that would take care of them all and put us $2300 closer to our goal.  Please consider doing this for me. 

For us. 

For Kylie.

Front of t-shirt