10.17.2011

Caring About What Others Think

Do you care what other people think?  About you?  About your family?

I have come to the realization that I do.  That's my confession...I can't help it.  I care what other people think.  You know how I figured that out? 

I figured it out because I still get uneasy when walking into a public place with Katie.  I am always watching for the staring, whispers, questions etc.  And I hate it.  I hate that I even care.  What difference does it make to me that other people might not understand why we have Katie.  Might whisper about why she's with us.

And if we don't stick out enough as it is (big black dog who goes everywhere we do), when Kylie comes along, I'm sure we'll get even more attention.  She won't look like us.  Some won't understand how she is with us since we are all white.  Some will whisper and stare and wonder what's wrong with her lip.

So, I'm working on not caring about that.  She will be part of us just like Katie is already part of us.  And if they don't understand, it's their problem, NOT mine.

Just some random thoughts.

5 comments:

Lillie Family said...

I care. I wish I didn't care but I do. I am working on it.

People already ask rude questions, I am nervous about what will happen when we get home. How will I deal with it? How will I protect Emma?!

Anyway, thanks for sharing.

brook said...

i totally get it. a lady was STARING hard core into my stroller yesterday where my darling Chinese daughter and her blonde haired brother sat yesterday. I was sure she was trying to figure out my family....or maybe was wanting to know why Olivia had only one shoe on. lol. Then she asked me where my son went to school and I thought that was a stupid way to ask me about my family....but it turned out that my son and her son were in the same class last year in preschool and she recognized him. lol. she didn't say anything about Olivia and her shoe. but in that brief moment I thought she was starting at Livie....I was not really sure what I was going to say. This is my 6th adoption and I have been an adoptive parent for 9 years.....the akwardness that surrounds stupid questions never gets easier...>BUT...I will say that after lots of time goes by you do realize that MOST of the time you are in public, no one cares you are there. lol. and you stop feeling awkward everytime you leave your house. :) lol.

brook

Christy said...

When Eli was diagnosed, I spent a lot of time worrying about what other people were thinking. Would people think he was a bad kid, or we were bad parents? It still bothers me sometimes what people think, especially when he is acting up. I just pray that God will get my mind off what people are thinking and let me just be involved with my family. It also helps to think that others have been there, others will be there in the future, and you don't know what is going on in others lives. On more than one occasion, I have met someone who has been a blessing to me or I have been a blessing to them in these "difficult" situations.

Melissa said...

You go girl .... be strong .... I can't believe people still look oddly at families who adopt children of another race in this day and age ....

Cheryl said...

Tell them Katie is adopted :-)