30 Days of Thanks - Day 13

Today I am thankful for my freedom.

Yes, I know I should have posted this one last week on election day, but I was quite tired of the election by the time the day came, weren't you?  GAH.

But yes, I voted and took Kylie with me.  And I got to thinking how thankful I am that I live in a country where I not only have the freedom to vote for the elected officials I wish, but also can freely disagree with others political stance without getting thrown into jail.

I can worship as I wish.  Worship WHO I wish.  There are people in other countries who do not have that freedom.

I am thankful.

Finding...Part 3

*If you haven't read parts 1 and 2, you can do that now.

Imagine our surprise to find out the police report had much of anything of substance in it.  As we continued to speak with our China investigator, we had to decide how much work she would do for us when she traveled.

We did not desire to do what I would consider a full birth parent search which includes putting up posters and interviewing people.  But we did very much want pictures of the finding area and the village where Kylie was found since we wanted to show Kylie where she likely came from.

Before long, it came time for our investigator to travel.  We decided to have her see if she could locate the finder using the information in the police report and get a little bit of the story of Kylie's finding just so we could clarify where she was found (some translations said a hotel, some said a restaurant).  Also, this Mama's heart's desire was for someone to know that Kylie was here in America, happy and healthy.  I can only imagine how often Kylie's China Mama thinks of her and wonders where and how she is.

Last Sunday, I woke up to an email from our investigator.  She had traveled to Jiangsu and been to Kylie's finding spot.  And the information that came out of that trip...well...more to come on that.  For now, see where my baby girl was found.

See that electric pole right in the center of the photo?  That is exactly where she was found in the wee hours of the morning on January 31, 2011.

Our investigator managed to locate the finder.  And we now have a pretty full story of how she was found...more to come...

30 Days of Thanks - Day 12

Today I am thankful for my sweet Asian blessing, Kylie.

I could say so much more.

But today...

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks - Day 11

Today I am thankful for my family.  Over the past several years, I've lost several members of my family, but the ones that I have left I love dearly.

Jenna is fortunate to get along so well with her cousin, Garrett and my sister Teresa acts more like a grandmother to Jenna than an aunt!

We don't get together all that often, but when we do, I always leave with my heart full.  And this is the season where we will see them a little more often than usual and I can't wait.

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks - Day 10

Today I am thankful for my Lifegroup.

At our church, we don't have traditional Sunday School.  When we launched our regional campus, we called it serve one, worship one.  Launch members would serve one hour (teach a children's class, greet, usher, help park etc) and then the next hour we'd worship one.

In place of the standard Sunday School class, Lifegroups were created.  Most of them, including the one we are in, meet Sunday nights.  And that buzz phrase that has become so popular is oh-so-true with these folks...we really do "DO LIFE TOGETHER".

Now this is only the ladies in our Lifegroup and there are some honorary members missing too, but lemme tell you....THIS is my family (well, a small portion of them).  I left for China on Wednesday and made Steve Skype me into Lifegroup meeting both Sundays I was in China.  OH YES I DID.  And I'll tell you what, seeing these faces from thousands of miles away was like a fresh drink of water.  I literally teared up seeing them.

I have every one of their cell numbers and know I could text, call or email any of them at any time for any need and they'd come running.  You just don't find that everywhere.  It seems like there's just not enough words to say how thankful I am for this group of Believers.

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks - Day 9

Today I am thankful for my son Chase.

Like with Micah, I met Chase when he was a wee one.  Around 6 years old, I think.  For years, I thought Chase could take me or leave me.  As in, he was cool that I was around, but I always thought he'd be cool if I wasn't.  What I have learned is that he is just that kind of laid back.  When Jenna was born, Micah was enamoured and in love, Chase was like "Meh.  Does she do anything other than eat, sleep and cry??"  (Let it be said that Jenna loves both of them like nuts now!)

Chase was very good at arguing and I'm a little surprised he didn't end up as a lawyer.  He'd certainly make a good one!!

Anyway, several years ago, Chase was working a job near me and we were having lunch one day when he said, "I don't want to work a $10/hr job the rest of my life."  My advice to him was, "Then you need to do what you have to do NOW, while you have few responsibilities, to ensure you don't HAVE to work a $10/hr job for the rest of your life."

A few weeks later he joined the Marine reserves and went off to boot camp.  I was terrified for him, but he blew through boot camp like a champ.  After training, he came home and got a job as a mechanic.  Fast forward a few years and he now runs his own tire/battery store here in the area.  And yes, I'm proud to report the boy probably makes 12454 times what I do for a salary.  I'm hoping for a real nice Christmas present this year.  :)

At any rate, I love this boy more than I thought possible.  And I love talking to him.  I'm so proud of him.

I am thankful.

Finding...Part 2

*If you haven't read part one, you can do that here.

At the end of part 1 of the story, we ended with deciding to hire this woman to see if she could locate Kylie's actual finding spot.

We had seen other families who would visit the finding spot and photograph everything looking out from that spot as if to show their child later the view they would have had and I just wanted a little something like that.

On a fluke, and I'm not sure really why I even bothered to do it, I emailed Kylie's orphanage and asked if they could send a copy of the police report to me with another family who was traveling soon.  I had the good fortune of photographing this family's child when I picked up Kylie and so I asked them if they could deliver the report back to me if I emailed the orphanage and they were more than happy to oblige.

Anyway, I never got a response from the orphanage and quite frankly, I forgot the family had even traveled.  Then, one day I received an email stating they not only had visited the orphanage, but the orphanage staff had indeed received my request and provided them our police report!

I was so excited and when it arrived in the mail, asked my Chinese neighbor to tell me what it said.  I was, admittedly, slightly disappointed when she relayed basically what was in the referral papers. 

So, a few more months pass and then I realize if I want this lady to get going on my trip, I'd better forward her all the paperwork she needed.  I emailed her everything she asked for and then also included the police report in case it would further identify Kylie's exact finding spot.

It was after she received the paperwork when she emailed me back and told me the news...

The police report listed the name and address of the gentleman who found Kylie.

More to come...

30 Days of Thanks - Day 8

Today I am thankful for my parents.  Both of my biological parents have now passed away.

My mother died when I was 18 at the age of 55.  Daddy was around much longer...until he was 81 and died just a few years ago.

My dad worked hard so Mama could stay home.  We were not rich, but they provided everything I needed and much of what I wanted.

And they raised me in church.  They were faithful to that calling and in turn, I grew to love God, the church and learning to be more Christlike.

I'm so thankful that my parents loved me enough to discipline me.  Push me to be the best I could be.  And encouraged me to make good decisions.

So today I'm thankful for my God-fearing, though not perfect, parents.

30 Days of Thanks - Day 7

Today I'm thankful for our good health.

Considering Steve's 45+ year affair with Juvenile Diabetes, I'd say he's in pretty good shape!  He just went for his annual physical and his doctor agrees.

Jenna is perfectly healthy.  Perfectly average in her height and weight.  Very little problems other than seasonal allergies.

Even though we know very little of Kylie's health history, so far, she has been extraordinarily healthy.  Her surgeries (tubes and palate) have been near perfect.

With so many others fighting (or having fought) things way worse, today, I'm thankful for the health of my family.

Finding...

At first, I wasn't going to share this information here.  But it is so important to us that I feel like I need to document some of it for Kylie later.  It's heavy stuff, at least for me, so I might take it in pieces...

When families travel to China to pick up their adopted children, many of the have the privilege of going to the "finding spot".  This is the very place their child was found abandoned.  Most times the referral paperwork will tell you generally where your child was found and many children are left at the doors of hospitals, orphanages or police stations in the night or wee hours of the morning.

We knew from Kylie's paperwork that she was found near a restaurant in a nearby village (likely the one her birth mom/parents live in).  Unfortunately, the village was another 90 minutes away from the orphanage which we visited and that was already a 4 hour drive ONE WAY.  So we were just unable to visit the finding place, which was very disappointing for me.  I really wanted to see this place, take video, pictures in order to piece together as much of Kylie's first days for her as I could.

After arriving home, a few months passed and I posed the question to the adoptive community I was part of and was told, by several families, of a young woman in China, who used to work for an adoption agency and who now does birth parents searches.  The same name came up over and over again.

Now, for those of you are are not China adoptive parents, let me tell you a little background...abandoning your child in China is illegal and carries with it stiff penalties regardless of reason.  There is no "safe place" to drop your child for it to be cared for.  So finding birth parents rarely happens and it is a HOT TOPIC among adoptive families and even some adoptees.  We were very undecided on this point and so we have elected not to do an exhaustive search for Kylie's birth parents.  However, the woman will also travel to the finding place and take photos and video for us for a reasonable fee (at least *I* thought it was reasonable...cheaper than traveling back there myself!)

And so, because I felt like it was very important we have this information for Kylie when she gets older, we hired the lady who said she would likely not travel until fall or winter.  So we had plenty of time to wait...

More to come...

30 Days of Thanks-Day 6

Today I am thankful for my daughter Micah.  I met Micah during a rather difficult time in her life.  At 10 years old, she and I became close fast.

I would have never imagined I could love a child as deeply and fiercely as I loved Micah and her brother.  I wasn't a perfect stepparent, but I hope she would agree that I tried my best and everything I did was out of love (she might get that more now that she's a mom herself!)

Micah was (and will forever be) my brown-eyed girl. 

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks-Day 5

Today I'm thankful for my church.

Many of my best friends in the world go to my church.  We have a huge adoptive family presence and when you are on that journey, having folks who understand is invaluable.

The above photo was taken the night we arrived back in Nashville from China.  I wish I had video of that night.  I'm sure other passengers and families wondered what celebrity was getting off the plane! 

The people are my lifeline. 

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks-Day 4

Today I am thankful for my daughter Jenna.

This child has had her world completely turned upside down this year and has handled it with grace and maturity beyond what I could have ever imagined.

She went from being 11 years an only child where the world revolved around her to being a big sister and giving unconditional love and acceptance of this little Asian usurping her only child role.  In those early days where Steve and I were coming apart at the seams, she saw us at our very worst and not one time did she wish for things to go back to the way it was before or wish we'd never adopted.  She's 11 y'all.  Any of us would understand if she had.  But she didn't.  And there's no way to adequately tell you what kind of sister she is to Kylie.  I mean, people talk about it all the time.  It is one of the reasons I'm grateful we did wait as long as we did.  She is just...an amazing child of God.

I am thankful.

It's Orphan Sunday

Today is Orphan Sunday.  I thought about writing a super long post about what adoption means to me and all the ways you can get involved.  Instead, I've deferred to David Platt and his book "Radical" which incidentally was a catalyst in us beginning this journey ourselves...he says...

 

"...orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names.

They are easier to ignore before you see their faces.

It is easier to pretend they're not real

before you hold them in your arms.

But once you do, everything changes."

 

 

How true.

 

Anyone who has gone on a mission journey and worked with orphans will tell you.

 

And I can tell you.

 

From personal experience...

 

This face changed everything for us.

 

And continues to change us every day.

 

What is God telling YOU to do?

30 Days of Thanks-Day 3

Today I am thankful for...

Our financial blessings.  We are by no means rich in terms of how much money we have.  But I was just telling Steve the other night how overwhelming it is to think of how God has cared for us financially.

Steve has been out of a job for 3 years.  We went from living on two very good incomes to living on one income.  Probably a 40% cut in funds.  Miraculously, we have minimal debt and have paid for a mission journey to South Africa and completed an international adoption on one income.  Not only that, but we have not missed one mortgage payment or any other payment for that matter.

When we needed the money, it has been provided.

I am thankful.

30 Days of Thanks-Day 2

Today I am thankful for...

My husband, Steve.

Steve is 15 years older than me and in many ways raised me as a wife since I was so young when we married (21 years old).  He is so patient with me and I can say there has NEVER been what I'd call a "knock down drag out" fight between us.  There have been very few nights where we go to bed angry.  And our marriage is quite nearly a 10 out of 10, though it definitely hasn't come easy and it's not anything I can take credit for.

I would venture a guess that a lot of people (family and friends included) wondered if we'd make it.  Well, nearly 17 years later and we are still going strong.

I am thankful.

Family Photos!!!

A few weeks ago, we met my good friend Samantha at Samantha Byers Photography, for some long overdue family photos.

The best thing about these photos is that they had my BIGS in them!!!  I love my big kids like nuts.  They were 10 and 6 (almost 7) when I met Steve and so I've been privileged to be part of their lives for a very long time.  5ish years ago, Micah gave birth to a son, Gage, and made me a "Mimi" at 33.

Now that they are grown, we don't see Micah and Chase as much and I miss them.  This is the first time Micah had even met Kylie and as I suspected, she took right to her.  So without further ado...the photos that will soon be hanging in my foyer...

 My handsome big boy, Chase.  He's gonna be a catch for the right girl.  He's motivated and a super hard worker.  And yeah, likely already makes 3x the salary I do.  I hope he remembers me when it's time to pick out my nursing home.  :)

Kylie is at the age where it's a big difficult to photography her because her attention span is about 2.534 seconds.  She really liked this chair though and was showing us how to say her prayers...and then saying "cheeeessseeee" at the same time.

Micah and Gage.  I know, right?  She can't deny him for sure.  And she is so pretty...always has been. I love this girl.  She is the best mom EVER.  She never ceases to amaze me.  And lemme tell you, both my bigs love Jenna to bits and pieces.  And Jenna is crazy about them both too.  To her, and now to Kylie, they are Sissy and Chasey.

Gage and Jenna.  I think he might like her a little.  This girl is the BEST with children.  She's gonna make a heck of a Mama some day.

She looks 15 here.  I don't wanna talk about it.  At first I was really frustrated with her hair and how it looked unkempt and not all smooth like how it looks best.  But you know, I decided I wanted to remember her just as she was at this age (which is ELEVEN, not 15!) and so I just let her be her.  I think she does a pretty good job of it.

There just aren't words to say how much I adore this photo.  LOVE LOVE LOVE.  I have been blessed with some dang good lookin kids...only one of which I can take biological credit for!

Sigh.

 

So if you are local and you want to capture your family like I did, click away on Samantha's link above and tell her I sent you.  Also, remember these?

Yep, that was Samantha too.  She has a special for adoptive families, so if you are local and adopting, click on because these homecoming photos are more valuable than almost anything I have for Kylie.



Happy Halloween Part II

Somehow we managed to stretch our Halloween celebrations for several days.  And this is a good thing because Halloween is one of Steve's favorite holidays.

Last Sunday night, our church Life group had our annual Halloween party.  I didn't have time to put an outfit together.  Well, I had the TIME, I just didn't have the creative thought to figure out what to do, so I donned my authentic Chinese dress and went as a China girl/Geisha/whatever.  Steve literally threw his outfit together a few hours before the party and got tons of compliments.  He was a zombie (shout out to TWD fans!) and apparently does a pretty good job on makeup. 

The girls got to wear their costumes and I almost died over the extreme cuteness.

I'm not sure Kylie knew what to make of Jenna at first...but she got used to her pretty quickly.  We also had her watch Steve putting his makeup on in the bathroom so she would know it was him.



 

And then this is our Life group.  We are a huge bunch of goofballs...kids at heart.  And yes, that's our Children's minister and his family dressed up as the good folk from Duck Dynasty. 

We roasted hot dogs and made s'mores.  Yum yum.  It was a great way to start our fall!!!

30 Days of Thanks-Day 1

So, I'm jumping on the bandwagon...the 30 Days of Thanks bandwagon, that is.  I first saw my friend Chrissy post about it on Facebook.  (Incidentally, Chrissy is also an adoptive mom and you should totally check out her blog...she has 8 children from Ethiopia and is AH-MAZING). 

I thought it would be a good way to remind ME of all the blessings I have, so away we go.  I'll post my thanks blogs at night and my regular posts in the morning, so be sure and check back. 

Today, I'm thankful for...

A great job that pays our bills and provides for my family.  I have been with my current company for nearly 15 years and have had the privilege to do many different jobs there, which has allowed me to expand my knowledge base more than I could have anywhere else.  Today I started yet another position that will allow me more exposure.  I'm proud to be part of an organization that gives back to the community.  Not a lot of companies do that.

I'm thankful.

Happy Halloween Part I

I know I need to get back to posting regularly, but I just can't seem to get myself together.

But I didn't want to let the day get away without reporting in on our Halloween festivities.  We finally got around to carving the humongo pumpkin Jenna picked from Gentry Farms a few weekends ago.

Jenna wanted to carve her own pumpkin and so we cautiously allowed it.  Of course, we just let her do the small pumpkins.

We let Kylie help "gut" the pumpkin but she wasn't too sure about that and didn't care much for getting her hands dirty.

So, she played with play doh while we carved (so much for that not liking to get her hands dirty theory!)

In the end, Jenna carved two little pumpkins and I carved the big one (after Steve topped it).  I think they turned out well.

Tonight, I was later leaving work than what I was meaning to be and the traffic was awful.  I managed to get home in time to change clothes and take the girls out.

Here she is dragging her bag across the yard for her first ever trick or treat...

And then here they are with our sweet neighbor, Aimee.  Aimee was so excited to be part of Kylie's first Halloween in the US!

After it was all said and done, even though Kylie wasn't crazy about the whole event, she and Jenna both ended up with plenty of candy.

And once Kylie figured out what all was in that bag...well, let's just say she probably would have gotten more into the trick or treating.